Think about how you feel before reacting – or you may not be able to help as much as you want.ĭon’t be upset if your child wants to talk to other adults and friends about the problem. Your own memories of being a child may help you empathise and find solutions, but they can also get in the way. You may feel anger, hurt, guilt, helplessness, or fear when you hear that your child is experiencing bullying. Never dismiss their experience, if your child has plucked up the courage to tell you about bullying, it’s crushing to be told to sort it out yourself or it’s all part of growing up. Don’t tell them to ignore it, as this can teach them that bullying has to be tolerated, rather than. It simply doesn’t solve the problem and if your child is under-confident (and most bullied children are) then it just adds to their stress and anxiety. Never tell your child to hit or shout names back. This is usually the very reaction children dread and can cause bullying to get worse. Things that may not helpĭon’t charge off demanding to see the head teacher, the bully, or their parents. Encourage them to join a club or activity like drama or self-defence. This builds confidence, helps keep the problem in perspective and offers a chance to make new friends. Help your child develop skills in a new area. Talk about how our voices, bodies and faces send messages just the same way our words do.ĭon’t let the bullying dominate their life. Role-play bullying scenarios and practise your child’s responses. Sometimes people say nasty things because they want a certain reaction or to cause upset, so if your child gives them the impression they’re not bothered, the bullies are more likely to stop. Encourage your child to try to appear confident by helping them build resilience as body language and tone of voice speak volumes. Remind them that being bullied isn't about being weak and that the person who is doing the bullying has the issues and that is why they feel the need to make others feel this way. Reassure your child it’s not their fault. Your child may fear reprisals if they report the bullying so they may need lots of support. You can ask them how they want you to take things forward, so they don’t feel excluded from deciding on next steps. Reflect what you have heard by ‘playing back’ to them what you hear. Put your own feelings aside, sit down and listen to what your child is telling you. It is important to try and listen without getting angry or upset.
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